BREAKING: Biz Caz Chaos Gridlocks Massachusetts Government

The extreme biz caz attire of a number of Massachussetts state government employees has thrown the capitol building into chaos. First reported by the Eagle Tribune, the state employees have pushed Beacon Hill’s biz caz dress code to the limits.

House Speaker Salvatore DiMasi has called for a strict dress code policy that requires men to wear top hats and jackets with tails while women are required to wear full-body burkas, with the option of wearing jeans underneath on Jeans Friday.

Some of the clothing items reportedly worn by employees include spandex shorts, Celtics jerseys and women have worn “skimpy summer fashions”, which, we imagine, means clear heals and pasties.

Some Republican sources confirm to the Biz Caz Blues that they have reached out to Washington in hopes that the Bush Administration will impose martial law, or at least make the state government subject to federal oversight.

A survey of state government workers eating lunch outside of the State House showed the divisiveness of the issue. One man, Johannesburg, who weighs approximately 325 pounds and asked that only his first name be used, said, “I wear spandex shorts and Celtics jerseys every Saturday and Sunday.  But in the work place, that’s just not right.” 

An opposing view was given by the man eating lunch with Johannesburg, who asked to remain anonymous, and incidentally, was wearing spandex shorts and a Celtics jersey who said, “The Celts are in the freakin’ finals fuh crissake.  Against the Lakers.  And you’re gonna sit there and tell me I can’t wear my jersey.  Well, you’ve got another thing coming.”

We will continue to update this story as it develops. Below are some recent photographs of government employees in and around the State House.

State employees about to enter a meeting.

State employees on their lunch break.

Government workers outside the State House.

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